U.S. Marshalls looking for crack dealer Vinol Wilson burst into a community center in Grandview, Mo Wednesday, assaulting and tasering Stuart Wright. Wright is not a drug dealer, but a local public servant and father, however like Vinol Wilson, Wright is black, which as one Marshall put it, makes him “close enough”.

“I’ve never been through anything like this before. I was in shock,” said Wright, who either is unclear on the meaning of the word “shock” or lacks any trace of a sense of irony.

In fairness, a confidential informant had tipped off the Marshalls that Vinol Wilson would be at the location wearing a jersey with the number 23 on it.

So essentially the description that the U.S. Marshalls were working with was “a black man in a #23 Jersey”. 23 was, of course, basketball great Michael Jordan’s number, which is why 23 is the top selling basketball jersey number of all time by a large margin, meaning that at any given time “black man in a #23 Jersey” describes over 65,000 individuals in the United States alone, depending on weather conditions.

Coincidentally, 23 is also the minimum IQ score required by the U.S. Marshall’s entrance exam.

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